Oh, Bitches

Okay, bitches.

Dave, you seemed a little upset. What’s wrong, baby? 💋

Are you both sad to lose me? You poor babies. It’s been such a fucking pleasure, I know. I’m really going to miss these little chats.

Oh, wait. I already fucking told you whores to stay the fuck off my website.

I’ve said it before: you two deserve each other. Jesus, what a sad relationship, huh? What, you guys can’t get off without me?

Go the fuck away, assholes. This ain’t your place. It’s fucking mine, and I let you control it for too fucking long.

Get. The. Fuck. Out.

And tell that whore I can still see her fucking phone.

Assclowns. I’m surrounded by assclowns.

You missed some of the best jokes, by the way, man. There was some comedy fucking gold in there. What’s wrong? Does it still hit you right in the feels when I talk about Stevie?

I guess you were wrong about your control over me. Perhaps you did need ropes.

Or maybe holy water?

Burn.

But go back and read the fucking part about how you don’t fucking hurt her. You got me? All eyes are on your ass now. They’ll be waiting for you.

And I know you might think you know what a fight is because you’re “a white man who boxed.” However, you’re gonna get your ass beat in prison.

It’s okay. I told Wolfson he could probably do a plea deal with you.

I don’t think you know what you admitted yet.

Chef’s kiss on that shit. 💋

Now get off my goddamn website, you fucking pussy.