So, Guess Who Joined AdultFriendFinder on the Anniversary of the Rape video?
I want to tell you a story. A funny story. And by funny, I mean the kind where you start laughing so you don’t burn the world down.
On February 2, 2024, I was raped. It was recorded. It was violent. It was by someone I loved. You know the story if you don’t, welcome to the site.
On February 3, 2025 exactly one year later a new user appeared on AdultFriendFinder with the username Vtguy13.
Let’s take a moment to appreciate the creativity.
He lists his location as Waterbury, Vermont.
Same tiny-ass town where my rapist, {D} moved to after getting fired in Nevada.
His profile lists kinks: rough sex, rimming, leather, toys, exhibitionism, anal, oral, voyeurism.
You know, not BDSM, though he was very clear about that when I called him out. Because apparently “rough sex and leather” are just a coincidence now.
He "flirted" with me in July, then waited until August to explain he had just happened to be in Vegas last week. Oh, but also he’s from Chile. But this was on a road trip. And lived in Vermont “for work.” But is not into BDSM. And definitely is not {D}.
Except I called him “{D}” in the message, and he kept talking.
Except he slipped up and gave me the name Cris.
Except I’ve already a tied “Cris,” Cris Phoenix, to a number listed as {D}'s on a user name back search.
Except his entire story doesn’t line up.
Except he blocked me the second he realized I wasn’t playing anymore.
Except {D}'s undergrad is in Latin American studies. Funny story about that, he wanted to be CIA but couldn't get in. He said he turned it down because the interview was too covert. Law school was the back up, a scramble to figure out what to do with his life because what the fuck do you do with a ug in Latin American studies.
This is what post-rape stalking looks like.
This is what it looks like when your rapist doesn’t get charged, doesn’t get arrested, and doesn’t get therapy; he just gets more usernames.
He comes back.
He pokes.
He gaslights.
He sets his profile to the anniversary of the assault and dares you to say something.
I said something.
And I’ll keep saying it until someone besides me sees this for what it is: coordinated psychological warfare. Not justice, not healing. Taunting. This is how abusers behave when the system tells them they’re untouchable.
And just to really drive the point home, the weekend before last I got a late-night text from a guy I’d talked to briefly on POF months ago. Except he wasn’t just some guy—he sent me a photo of me, pulled from my AdultFriendFinder profile. Within minutes he was bringing up fisting—the one act tied directly to my rape. I told him no. Then I told him I was uncomfortable. He kept going. Pushed. Questioned. Said he had big hands. Sent porn. It wasn’t random. It wasn’t flirtation. It was targeted. Same tactic, same violation, same psychological fingerprints. I recognize the behavior. I recognize the obsession. I recognize the cruelty. It’s him. He doesn’t stop. He just changes usernames.
Nut up {D}
You were too much of a pussy to actually face me a year ago. You want to talk shit to me now? Man up and do it in your own fucking name behind your own picture.
I'm not afraid if you.
But, you sure as shit are afraid of me.
Be a fucking man already.
You're acting like a bitch.
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